喜劇小品:優妹漢哥(第一集)(Funny Sis & Silly Bro)

【新唐人2010年1月1日訊】優妹妹漢哥哥

Funny Sis & Silly Bro

一群時潮的新人男女

A group of trendy people

執着﹕

Their life pursuit:

侃個痛快

Chat with pleasure

笑個開心

Laugh with passion

活的自在

Live for today

第一集

Episode 1

強拆氣煞中南海

Forced deconstruction enrages Zhongnanhai Office

奧巴馬要給全球退黨服務中心發新年賀辭的傳聞﹐迅速在全國傳開

元旦前夜﹐中共高層在中南海召開緊急會議

President Obama is going to send New Year greetings to Global Service Center for Quitting the Chinese Communist Party. The news is rapidly spread around China at New Year’s Eve and the CCP high-level officials are having an emergency conference in Zhongnanhai Complex over this issue.

秘書﹕Secretary:

奧巴馬要給退黨辦發新年賀電

Obama is going to send New Year greetings to Global Service Center for Quitting the

Chinese Communist Party

歐洲政要也要發賀電

And so are the European governments

我們怎么辦”?

What should we do?

中宣部長﹕

Minister of Central Bureau of Promotion:

封殺,封殺,封殺

Shut it out, shut it out, shut it out

公安部長﹕

Minister of Public Security:

所有退黨的統統抓

Arrest all those who quit the party.

司法部長﹕

Minister of Justice:

判 重重的判

Give them heavy sentences

胡總﹕

President Hu:

蠢,蠢,蠢!你們真的以為我和江一樣愚蠢嗎

Stupid, stupid, stupid! You think I am as big an imbecile as Jiang?

嗨!真是弱智

Sigh! It’s retarded

現眼都現到國際法庭上去了

Lose his face in International Court.

看看你們各個這個德行

Look at yourself…

這點事就沉不住氣了

Being so jumpy over this small issue

溫總﹕

Prime Minister Wen:

再這樣退下去

If more people quit the party

可能就剩下我們這幾個人了

There will be only a handful of us.

你們幾個部長都在

Now the ministers are here

你們看着辦吧

You guys think about what to do!

中宣部長﹕

Minister of Public Security:

我有一個主意

I got an idea

讓金正日出面

Let Kim Jong-il do the job

宣佈試射飛彈

Make an announcement of missile trial

這奧巴馬最頭痛的就是他

He is the biggest pain to Obama

公安部長﹕

Minister of Public Security:

我倒有個主意

I got an idea too

跟本拉登聯繫一下

Call Bin-laden

如果奧巴馬給發賀電

If Obama sends the greetings

我們花一點錢

We pay Bin-laden

在紐約給他放幾個人肉炸彈下去

Tell him to drop some human bombs in New York

溫總﹕

Prime Minister Wen:

司法部

Ministry of Justice

沒了主意的司法部長

The Minister of Justice has no idea

冒出了一身冷汗

He is sweating

這時 縣城管大隊長

Now an officer of county government

司法部長的遠房小舅子

A brother-in-law of the minister

酒後興起

has been drinking

打通了他的手提

He is calling the minister’s cell phone

借着醉意

and faking drunk

以出謀劃策為由

Trying to take advantage of the ideas he comes up with

打聽自己的調職事宜

To pry into the matter of his promotion

秘書﹕

Secretary:

給來點好主意 好

Okay, tell us what you got

溫總﹕

Prime Minister Wen:

什麼主意 說吧

Name it, what is that?

城管﹕

Officer:

二 二姐夫

My brother-in-law

你啥時候給俺調省里

When will you promote me to the provincial office?

這里太他娘的窮了

People are very poor here

一電油水都沒有

I can’t make any fortune

公安部長﹕

Minister of Public Security:

手下全是七大姑八大姨的

All staff are relatives

秘書﹕

Secretary:

少胡說八道

Stop talking rubbish

說正經事

Be serious

城管﹕

Officer:

噢 二姐夫您別急

Oh, my bro, don’t worry

俺現在就告訴你絕招

Let me give you good advice

第一:調集俺縣的強拆隊進入美國

First idea: I can summon the deconstruction team in my county and send them to America

只要二表姐夫一句話,几個小時之內就

My brother, just give me an order, within several hours

讓白宮片瓦不存

We can raze the White House to the ground

第二:俺們縣里到處都是神偷手

Second idea: We have so many expert thieves in my county

如果奧巴馬那小子不听話

If Obama doesn’t listen to us

元旦夜先給他們曼哈蛋水晶球摘下來

We steal the new year’s eve ball from Manhattan

過元旦

Celebrating the New Year’s Eve?

讓他們過鳥蛋吧

Now they have nothing to celebrate

怎么樣,二姐夫

What do you think, my bro?

司法部長﹕

Minister of Justice:

不要說廢話

No talking rubbish

說正事

Say something serious

中央 領導都在听

All leaders of Central Committee are listening

城管﹕

Officer:

中央

The Central?

中央個鳥

The Central is rubbish

二姐夫您就是中央

You are the Central

其他人都是鳥

All of them are rubbish

哈哈哈

Ha…ha…ha…

怎麼樣

So what!

二姐夫

Hey my bro…

眾﹕

All people:

總書記 總書記

President, President

城管﹕

Officer

二姐夫 二姐夫

Brother, brother

“優妹漢哥”製作組

Funny Sis & Silly Bro Production Team

祝觀眾

新年快樂

Wish you Happy New Year

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